I try not to use public restrooms... for two reasons... #1- I don't want anyone to hear me use the restroom. #2- I don't want to hear anyone else use the restroom.
Fast forward with me now to the local Wal-Mart... I had to go the second I left the house- but since I was not driving, I couldn't turn around. It was about 8pm... we had eaten dinner and now my bladder was VERY ready to explode. I knew I would have to go when I got to the store- but, I was hoping that it would just go away until I came back home.
We pull up in the parking lot and I KNOW that I will have to go while I am in the store... I can't hold it anymore!!! (side note: this has happened to me since I was prego with my daughter.) I calmly walk inside the store... I am not doing any sort of pee dance or anything- but I am behind a woman that looks like she is!!
Of course, my luck, we are BOTH headed to the same bathroom. So, I go to the one ALLLLLL the way on the end... (somewhere in my head, that means no one will hear me pee I guess).... I neatly spread one ply squares of toilet paper on the toilet seat and then I begin to hover. I have to go soooo bad but it seems like my body is being a little shy... it actually HURTS to hold your pee until someone makes a noise.
As I am contemplating when I am going to let the first trickle out... I CLEARLY hear the lady FAKING A COUGH TO COVER UP THE LOUD GAS SHE IS LETTING OUT. If you have ever met me, you know that if I think something is funny-- I WILL LAUGH.
SCCOORREEEE!!! I begin to giggle... almost like someone is tickling me! I tried to stop but I couldn't help but notice that between HER FARTS and MY GIGGLING... NO ONE COULD HEAR ME PEE!!!
The woman then decides that it is a good idea to say, "I'm so sorry... it's just running right through me." I am NO LONGER AMUSED... I continued to giggle a little and said, "We all do it." But, I have to admit that she made me feel strange by speaking to me while she was obviously in a VERY embarrassing moment.
Moral of the story?? Laugh hysterically EVERY TIME YOU GO IN A PUBLIC RESTROOM! (No one will hear you... and you won't hear them!)
No Worries
Ray
hahahahahahha.... ive had a walmart incident myself here in alabama. I am also reluctantly peeing in a walmart bathroom... squatting and trying to hurrrry and i am wearing flip flops and my toe nail polish is chipping. A younger sounding girl says... Vanessa? i say nooo...? she says Is that yo baby cryin out there? i say nooo..? then she says Girl you toes are tow(tore) up! Ummmmm first of all stop talking to me i dont know you...2nd of all that's ruuuude!!!! -jenny f
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