I am so profoundly confused. I will be settling with an insurance company soon and will be getting some form of compensation from that. I am excited in one way.... but in another, I am scared. What could I possibly be afraid of? MONEY!
I would love to pay my truck off. I would love to be able to start a business that I enjoy. I would love to be able to take a vacation... (because I have not had one in over a decade!) But, it seems to me that there are more people than I'd care to admit that are more excited for this settlement than I am. I want to do the right thing. I want to be able to help those in need. I want to be able to save and make my daughter's young adulthood easier. On the other hand, I want to be left alone about the money part.
I do not know how much I will actually get. My surgeries have to be paid, the doctors have to be paid, the attorney has to be paid, and the physical therapy bills have to be paid. I am thinking that maybe I should just get the check and run away. I do not want to run away because I cannot handle the money. I do not want to run away because I do not DESIRE to help people in financial need.... I want to run away because I feel that I might be utilized as an asset only... and not a person.
I will make it clear that not EVERY person in my life is doing this... but there is definitely a group that are salivating at that prospect of this money. The weird part is that I am not in that group.
No Worries
Ray
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